On character formation:
“Who we are becoming is more important than where we are headed… it isn’t just what we do but who we are. It all comes down to character.”
Scot McKnight, Pivot
Reflection: Many believe the ends justify the means. But, what we’ve failed to consider is how the means determine the ends themself. When we apply this to character formation, our destination will be far different based on how we’re being formed. Who we are determines where we end up and what we do along the way. The most important question we can ask ourselves is: who am I becoming? And for the Christian, an even more focused way to ask that is: who I am becoming like? Are we being formed into the image of Jesus or conformed into the ways of the world (Romans 12:2)? Once we figure out whose image we’re being formed into, then we can talk about what we do and where we go.
On unprocessed grief:
“What we take out in our journals, we don’t take out on friends and family.”
C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
Reflection: In Lewis’ memoir through the loss of his wife, I read these words and was deeply convicted. How often have I failed to process what’s going on in my heart: anger, grief, confusion, etc. If we have unprocessed emotions, it’s easy to take them out on family or friends. When we avoid this vital heart work, it can lead to problems. This isn’t to say we cannot process our feelings with those close to us (especially a spouse or confidant), just that we’re responsible to process them in a safe space before they boil over into our relationships.
On tolerating bad behaviors:
“Culture is created by the behaviors you tolerate. If you will tolerate bad behavior, people will learn they can get away with it.”
Jacob Engel, Forbes article “Why does Culture ‘Eat Strategy for Breakfast’?”
Reflection: I’m often tempted to remain silent when I see issues around me, yet silence can imply approval, even if I don’t. For this reason, I am all the more convinced that I must say something, even if it’s a small issue since every action (or inaction) speaks of what is acceptable conduct. For more on this subject, check out my article on The Sin of Silence.
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